My Fair Gentleman?

To be sung to the tune of "Why Can't A Woman " From My Fair Lady.

Mrs. Higgins:: Why can't my husband be more like Barack?
Barack is so handsome, so thoroughly cool.
Eternally upbeat, never a fool.
Who when you down will always give your tush a pat.
What can't a husband--be like that?

Why does every man do what frat brothers do?
Can't a husband ever make the bed ?
Barack asks Micchelle what would her mother do,
Then tells her mother she can move in instead.

Why can't a husband be more like Barack?
Barack is so pleasant, with such savoir-faire.
When he is with you, he'll notice your hair.

Would most men set aside a date night that's just ours?

Mrs. Pickering: Of course not.

Mrs. Higgins: Would they agree to walk the dog and scoop the poo?

Mrs. Pickering: Nonsense.

Mrs. Higgins: Would they act like sweet Barack and bring me flowers?

Mrs. Pickering: Seldom.

Mrs. Higgins: Why does a husband live in a zoo?

One man in a million may shop a bit.
Now and then there's one who's not a mess.
One perhaps who'll like to take you out a bit.
But by and large they'll never notice your dress.

Why can't a husband take after Barack?
Who'll take you to Paris and tell you to shop.
A lifelong companion--he's over the top.

If by mistake I hugged the Queen would Barack shout?

Mrs. Pickering: Of Course not.

Mrs. Higgins: If I hate cooking and I said so would he mock?

Mrs. Pickering: Never.

Mrs. Higgins: Does he complain when girls talk what girls talk about?

Mrs. Pickering: Never.

Mrs. Higgins: Why can't my husband be more like Barack?