Found: Lacking in Common Census

Al Franken has been elected after a longer election night than they have in Alaska. On Ground Hog Day in Minnesota, when the eponymous rodent sees Norm Coleman's shadow, it means six more months of litigation. Minnesota's congressional delegation will range from Franken on the left to Michele Bachmann on the right, that, is from the former intentionally comic, to the current unintentionally humorous legislator.

Recently Bachmann has been carrying on about the census. She says it has been used in the past to round up the Japanese to place them in internment camps. (Did Lou Dobbs respond: "Not that that's a bad thing!"?) So she will not be filling out much of her census questionnaire. "I know for my family the only question we will be answering is how many people are in our home," she said. "We won't be answering any information beyond that, because the Constitution doesn't require any information beyond that," the maverick Congresslady said. Since she works for the government, you think they'd know where to find her when the round up begins. Maybe where Uncle Sam sends her paycheck would be a god place to start looking.

If she tells her employer, Congress, that she lives in a post office box (but wait--isn't the post office part of the government conspiracy to acquire knowledge about you--like the size of your zip code?), the sneaky Dems can just put a piece of legislation on the floor to replace the FBI with ACORN and then conduct a quorum call; the equivalent of yelling "Marco," and waiting for her "Polo" in response.

What she said was : "Take this into consideration. If we look at American history, between 1942 and 1947, the data that was collected by the Census Bureau was handed over to the FBI and other organizations at the request of President Roosevelt, and that's how the Japanese were rounded up and put into the internment camps." She is against that, because she does not want the government to force her office to employ a Japanese intern.

She has also voiced concerns that AmeriCorps, created by FDR, will result in mandatory reeducation camps for American youth. On Hardball, she said members of congress should be investigated for being “unamerican”. She has courageously taken a position insisting that the dollar remain the currency of the United States--something that currently is the law of the land (31 USC Section 5103). No one has suggesting replacing it with the yuan yet.

She remarked to the media: "I find it interesting that it was back in the 1970s that the swine flu broke out then under another Democrat president Jimmy Carter. And I'm not blaming this on President Obama, I just think it's an interesting coincidence." The 1976 swine flu scare happened on Gerald Ford's watch.

She is also against the census because she says that ACORN will be doing it. Even if that were true, which it isn't, wouldn't she be better off raising her concerns in some legislation to block it, since that's what congresspersons do, rather than by committing civil disobedience, and risking a one hundred dollar a question fine (13 USC Sec. 221) ? Or does she suspect that not enough of her colleagues share her rampant paranoia about this issue, because they think her elevator doesn't go all the way to her penthouse?

She told Sean Hannity about the census: "They don't ask, "Are you an American citizen?" They don't ask if you're here on a visa or when it expires. We have no real idea how many illegal aliens are in our country. But wouldn't you think, here they are asking every personal question about our lives, they could at least ask if we're an American citizen? They don't bother to ask for that.

Here is where they ask the question on page 18 of the long form census questionnaire. The census has asked that question since 1850.

As we have noted before in this profile, this year the census will nominally be headed by a celebrity--Sesame Street's Count Von Count, the first openly Vampire-American (Blood type V Positive) to have a prominent place in national politics. Vampires are a group traditionally under represented in government (at least on the day shift). (We could only find one. According to this web encyclopedia, he is Karl Rove).

What would be the ultimate irony of a Minnesota census boycott urged by Bachmann ? " The Minneapolis Star Tribune ran a fascinating editorial [last week], which pointed out that by urging her constituents not to take part in the 2010 Census, Bachmann may end up costing herself her own House seat, because if Minnesota does lose a House seat, Bachmann seat is a prime candidate for absorption."

And for tonight, that's the last laugh.