People are Always Dyin' to Get on TV

In February 1958 when Hollywood mogul Harry Cohn died, a classic comment (usually attributed to Red Skelton) was uttered when the wit saw the large number of people showing up for Cohn`s funeral: Give the people what they want, and they`ll turn out for it!

The Michael Jackson memorial service was such a big hit in the TV ratings that one network is thinking of making it into a series next year. Many people were wondering how an aging pop star of the rock era would be able to make money now that there's a new generation out there "who knew him not" as they say in Exodus 1:8. The nostalgia tours were wearing thin-- The Rolling Stones Jumpin' Geriatric Tour was not raking in the cash as their fans aged along with the stars. Many former celebrities, too old for "I'm A Celebrity--Get me Out of Here" found themselves between a Rock Cafe and a Hard Place.

The answer may be to sell exclusive rights to cover their memorial services and funerals. One network is planning a show tentatively called "America Had Talent." Death appears to be a good career move for some older stars of yesteryear. Instead of cops and cowboys saying to their sidekicks "Cover me" as they rush the bad guys, aging rock stars will be requesting the newer peripatetic bands of the current era to "Cover me."

Week after week gold caskets covered with Swarovski crystals and more flowers than gangster and/or Princess Di sendoffs will grace America's screens. We need something to boost the economy--and this might be it! Can't you just see the headline in Variety: "Fossils Fuel the Economy! " ?