NPR Names Kermit T. Frog As New President

Borrowing one of the famous faces of public television, NPR has chosen to rebrand itself by making Kermit The Frog its new president. Click and Clack have been named Vice Presidents.

Kermit was chosen because he has been an excellent fund raiser, so he is already familiar to the do good crowd; and since he is green, is believed to be able to remind them to send some green from their wallets.  "It's not easy raising green," Kermit has famously said.

"NPR's image has been that of a serious, long winded, and overly detailed know it all professor for too long," a board member noted.  "We needed to choose someone with more of a fun image, but who our listeners thought of as an entertaining teacher when they were still young.  Kermit fits that bill.  We ignored all the rumors about his dalliance with Snookie after his longtime affair with Miss Piggy (to whom she bears a resemblance).  Kermit's first move will be to have a muppet anchor "All Things Considered." He has hired Edward R. Burro, luring him away from Comedy Central's "Jackass" show.

Brian Williams of NBC was rejected for the job because he failed his audition when he employed the phrase "You won't believe what happened" four times going into a break.

Click and Clack, also adapt at fundraising, are part of the NPR entertainment lineup.  "When you think of trouble with your car, you think of entertainment and laughter.  Click and Clack can fix anything, so we've brought them aboard to fix our income stream," the head of the search committee, Art O. Darkness, told this blog.  "They've given us an estimate that just happens to be the cost of a new boat," he said, something their producer has confirmed.